Well, hello friends!
This week I want to shift gears and talk about YOU. That's right, mama. Right now, you may be locked in the house with your immediate family, unable to see others. Maybe you venture out and see immediate family or other families who you know have kept their distance and are following safety protocols as best they can. Either way, your social life has more than likely dwindled.
During these times, it is easy to feel like there is so much we are missing. We are missing things, I won't pretend that we aren't, but there is light in all of this. We just have to search for it.
My family's experience may be different than yours - that is okay! We are here to share and overcome together.
I have mentioned in previous posts that my daughter has a cyanotic congenital heart defect. Though she had a successful repair, she is still considered high-risk due to her history. We have had to completely quarantine at home to ensure her safety. We cannot take any risks, especially since my husband still goes to work. We have cut off visitation of any kind, including immediate family. On my side of the family, we are also trying to keep my mother safe, as she suffers from chronic respiratory illnesses.
This has not been an easy task. Family members have not met our daughter. My in-laws have not held her since she was two weeks old. My family cannot visit, despite living in the same city. We have not seen friends in person since her birth. In terms of physical interactions, I have been limited to my husband, daughter, our two dogs, and our daughter's doctors.
Some days are better than others, especially when it is rainy. You just curl up with some stories or toys and nap the days away with the kids. Other days, you sit and think of everything you can't do: no trips to the zoo, Disney, or backyard parties.
For a while, it was easy to sit and dwell over what had been missed. Every conversation centered around what we would be doing if COVID would go away. After a while, though, it just became depressing. There was no joy in our lives outside of being parents. We loved spending all of this time with our girl but once she was asleep, we felt trapped.
We had to find a way to make this feel somewhat normal, for as long as it lasts.
And we did. With the help of our family!
While virtual interactions are not our favorite, by any means, we have been making the most of it. Both Nana and Mimi have recorded videos of themselves reading stories for us to play for Little Miss. At first, this worried me. I worried about keeping her in front of a screen too much. Then I realized, she doesn't look at the screen half the time. She just stares at the ceiling and listens. She recognizes her grandmothers' voices and is entranced! We do the same with songs that they sing for her.
Little Miss’s Mimi has made a game out of looking at the number of cases reported each day. She FaceTimes or texts and says, "Little Miss, _____ more _______ until I get to see you!" Her time measurements range from light years to bunny hops. She makes up the funniest things. After providing the report, she sings the song she used to sing to me as a baby and Little Miss’s face lights up! She laughs and grabs at the phone every time. She FaceTimes my dad, who she calls Papi, and he loves to show her off to his coworkers.
Little Miss’s Nana and PawPaw live out of state, so they are unable to do drive-by visits from the road. To make sure she remembers them, Nana recorded her voice in a Build-A-Bear to play. (Right now, we are trying to teach our dog that Rosie bear is not for him.) She has also recorded herself reading stories, a couple of songs, and little messages for us to play for throughout the day.
My aunt, who our daughter calls Titi Buela, also calls and plays peek-a-boo with her "moon pie". She just laughs and laughs.
We schedule virtual play dates with the cousins, all of whom are around her age, and we get to see our nieces and nephew grow and discover.
These calls have made it so that Little Miss recognizes her family when they call. She may not know who they are yet, but she knows that the voices are friendly and familiar, which is so important to us.
All of these stories seem so silly at times, but they have made such a difference in our well-being. We maintain the connections and relationships with our families. We have made a routine out of talking to our families to the point that Little Miss cracks up whenever she hears the dial or ring tone for FaceTime! We keep our screen time reasonable, but it is her interaction with her family. It is also a time for my husband and I to take a mental break and just be us with our families.
These times have a tendency to feel isolated. It feels like everything we know has been ripped away and we have no estimate for when it will return. And you know what? That is hard to handle. But if you make the effort to lean on your village. To find new ways of interacting with a family, well, it feels like a new semblance of normal. Even just for a moment.
My friends, I hope that you are faring well during these challenging times. Know that my prayers and thoughts are with you.
Have you found any interesting ways to maintain your relationships during this pandemic? I would love any suggestions you may have!
Until next time. Be safe. Be well.
0 Comments